What it takes.
Something has happened, my entire week planned to be on TryHackMe and log progress has been derailed.
In a good way.
What it Takes - My Journey into Cybersecurity
- 6 years.
- 2,743 job applications.
- 116 responses (in one way or another).
- 2 interviews.
- 0 successes.
- 1 lucky break.
- 1 eJPT win.
- 1 OSCP loss.
- Imposter Syndrome.
- an RTO (from ZeroPointSecurity) delay - I’ll get it done I swear!
- 1 part time job.
- 2 very nice people gifting subs to TryHackMe and HackTheBox.
- The end of the part time job into a ‘full time’ carer job.
- A loss…
- 1 new beginning.
- 1 great friend letting me voulenteer.
- Imposter Syndrome.
- 1 more late night, completely rushed application.
- 1 call back.
- 2 very nice people in our local community helping get me smart clothes again (I grew up in all 3 axis, need to workout more).
- 1 interview that was supposed to be 90 minutes but pushed over 2 hours.
- Good news, but a delay.
- ???
- 1 win.
In the beginnning
To tell my story I need to roll back the clock to 19[REDACTED] I was born on a crisp [REDACTED] morning, very early, at a completely normal baby weight and other things or so I am informed.
I went into my teens without a father figure, he passed when I was 8 going on 9 years old, I realise now as a grown up he never got to see the further adventures of the USS Enterprise-D, what happened in Generations, the return in Picard. A memory that lives with me forever is something he never experienced… But I do remember my dad HATED computers. He was all about Pen and Paper, so the next section is just funny.
Computers
At school (I won’t say the level/year group) we got exposed to computers, specifically a BBC Computer with a 5.5inch floppy that we absolutely touched every chance we got only to be then replaced by the babiest of boxy Macs.
I knew when I first touched them (and while my Dad was alive) that computers were the future, they were going to be making our lives easier and better… did they deliver on that? well I leave that to Scott Hanselmans Ted talk - Tech Promised Everything. Did it deliver? - TEDxPortland for me, the answer was ‘yes’.
So to loop back a little, going into my teen years we got our first computer, it was a monster and it was allowed to be in my room.
Now I have to point out that I did technically have a computer before this, I had a Commadore 64 with a cassette drive and I recall using my Dads incredibly expensive Sony Hi-Fi with its dual tape deck to copy my friends game of Johnny Quest, yes 1991s best game ever.
But yes we got a ‘computer’ in this case a Windows 95 beast under a Compaq badge.
We played solitare, Encarta and that weird snake mosnter game where you fly around on a magic carpet and throw fireballs at them and I swear it came with Encarta (which did have a hidden game but this wasn’t it).
I learned how to use a Word Processor, Spreadsheets and all sorts through I do admit a lot of time was ‘played’ in paint, flinging the pencil round and making a mess then using the fill tool to fill in sections and make a colourful mozaic.
This was what we did without the internet kids.
The Internet
So eventually I grew up, broke the computer by pressing the ‘sleep’ button which cracked off into the case. That pissed me off, so I opened the computer and learned how to fix it. I was already experienced at taking things appart and putting them back together, my Megadrive, my sisters ghetto blaster (sterio),, I actually cut all the wires in that and sellotaped them back together again, she didn’t know and neither did anyone else.. I was a nerd.
I also discovered AOL CDs after my sister who moved out, married and had access to ‘the net’.
Every time my mum would go out I would throw a 20 foot telephone extension cable to the plug downstairs (the master socket) and dial up the internet, at the time I was downloading perfectly legal Dragonball Z AMV videos, sick music, sick DBZ fights.. match made in heaven as well as all the songs I could for an 16Mb MP3 player but I digress.
After running up some pretty big phone bills for downloading a 3Mb .wmv file for 3 hours, we evantually got broadband, I did help convince my mum as it was ‘needed for school’.
I eventually got a job working at Currys (Electronics retailer in the UK) selling Laptops, cameras and eventually games consoles, I made good friends working there.
As time went on I eneded up making my own computer with my friends, we were all nerds and gamers so obviously a VooDooFX 256Mb graphics card and a Pentium 4 with (I think it was) 8 GB of RAM was what we all built to play Ahe of Empires 2… I had the coolest case though, It wasn’s like my mates Thermaltake or the others knockoff one.. Mine was clear acrylic so you could see it thinking and lighting up.
More Games
So working at Currys we had a small games section and one day I came in and my display end (end of isle) had a 28 inch (massive for the time) widescreen TV on it and a locked displaycase underneath it.
Old people will tell you now that a 28inch TV back then was about 3 foot wide and 2 foot deep for the ‘tube’ part of the TV… the display case though, that was new what was it for?
My manager walks in with a black box, I really needed glasses so all I could see was a box that was half black, the other half had a green man pointing a gun at me at the top quarter and the lower had a taxi on it.
When I walked closer I discoverd that this was the new ‘Xbox’ from Microsoft, a fat heavy bastard that could power the gaming of the future, at the time the heaviest consoles were a Dreamcast or as big as n N64, timeline in my head is suffering from ‘being old’ so the PS1 and PS2 were out and the Gamecube too I think… The Xbox included Halo and Crazy Taxi.
I watched as it was set up and I put my hands on the controller, the controller S as the Dukes were ‘too big for mortal british people’ and from that moment I knew this was gaming (so to speak) this was where I would spend my time when not at work, to be fair when I was at work I would be on it driving round on Silent Cartographer and killing things, showin gthe graphics quality to everyone and any kids that wanted to show their parents a new game to play.
Siderant
Funny story on this as we move time forwards I was at University with that student loan burning a hole in my pocket (as you do in the UK) and the Xbox 360 launched… The hype… the Power!! - Me and my friends knew we would upgrade to them at some point, afterall we were gamer nerds and needed the latet and gratest.
I was biding my time in the town centre and I popped into HMV (at the time the biggest music/entertainment shop in the country) and asked off the cuff “hey I don’t suppose you have any of them 360’s laying around?” I was launch day so ‘normally’ all stock is sold out way in advance.. the guy looks at me and goes “actually yeah we do let me double check” I think the suprise on my face was notable… he came out with that white box, the 360, the standy uppy one that weighed 8 tons in the box with its power adapter…
“Comes to £349” I heard… I handed over my card and it swiped… Payment taken… Just like that.
On day one release I had a 360… I was so happy, excited, then the realisation ‘oh shit I have 3 lectures’.
I carried that absolute unit all day, hid it under my coat so noone would see and eventually made it home.
I remember vividly opening the box, pulling everything out and getting it all wired up and logged in.
The dashboard.
The blades.
Ooo HexiX HD as well as the purchased Kameo game I got (everyone else got Viva Pinata and I don’t know why)
I was gorgeous.
Then I got a chat invite.
It was my friend.
I put on the new sexy white headset.
His first words: ‘Hey Muz, why does it say [REDACTED] online in Xbox360 dashboard?’
“Whaaa?? I have no idea must be a bug or something I had a big update this morning.” I responded…
Obviously that folded in on tself and we got to talking about the new console, eventually he got one as did our other friends and we all started learning new Slurs in Halo 2 Matchmaking.
Back on track
So from working at Currys I got to try alot of new things to find how they would so I can sell them to people, I am happy(?) to report I never sold extended warranties, I should have but I couldn’t convince people to spend more money on something so just ‘lived with it’.
I completed my first 2 years at Uni while working in Currys and decided to take a gap year before completing my course and getting a BSC Hons.
Turns out this was a mistake as when I went back the course didn’t exist anymore… So I ended up getting only an FDSC in Information Technology Software (programming) and opted to just get a full time job working at an EPOS company.
YouTube
While working there and being a nerd in my spare time I discovered Youtube for learning and just general fun stuff.
While I enjoyed gaming content since the Red Vs. Blue days, I did want to branch out and randomly I discovered my now good internet friend Jose Barrientos and his video - Using Magic Powers to mess with loud neighbors
That single video reminded me of what I enjoyed about computers (making them do things) and what could be possible.
Now bear in mind that this video is 12(!) years old as of today, I can assure you I was not a talented hacker, hell I didn’t even know where to start.
An idea
Now everyone want’s to be a Red Teamer, everyone wants to write the code and push the button to watch the reaction or the event.
Truth be told, we aren’t all on that level, I know I aint.
Now this is a process that took years for me to discover a way into.
I’ve done various computer jobs over the years, the last one before ‘the event’ was actually assembling custom spec PCs for customers at someplace that I wont mention other then the fact that some of the staff there stalked me on LinkedIn and made a big fuss for the things I put on there (which didnt effect them in the slightest as it was my job title) but because of that I left the company… assholes.
The Event
Now this might be easy to track on but this was the Pandemic, I noticed in in November of 2019 when shit started going sideways in Wuhan and people were being sealed in buildings BUT absolutely noone in the UK (on my friends lists etc) gave anything of a shingle f*ck about it.
I was like ‘hey this guy says its getting bad and spreading’ and absolutely nothing happened till they noticed ‘aww were being locked in for 2 weeks in March’.
I don’t get humanity sometimes.
But back on track, I was unemployed and living on Job Seekers Allowance (then Universal Credit). I had been trying to do things and whatnot, applying for jobs though the pandemic realy put a stopper in that one… In the background nothing was happening, then a Discord I joined had an announcement ‘ICSI - Certified Networking Security Specialist’ course and cert was FREE!!!
Free training is something I can absolutely afford.
I had been following hackers and researchers for a while, infact my twitter had gone from Motovlogger to hacker over the period of a few years and I had been watching a lot of Networking content from people like NetworkChuck, Cisco Panter, Duan Lightfood etc.
I figured I might never be smart or dangerous enough to be a Red Team Operator, but someone will always be needed to plug in routers and switches etc in the Data Centre (or closet).
So I bit the bullet and started learning.
Learning
I eneded up completing the training and getting the certificate in Network Security. - I was on fire.
I had been googling CCNA prep CCNP, figuring I would go all in on networking but something in me was relighted.
The security content of that course reminded me how much fun security can be.
I was always living between two worlds, Networking and Security.
I took the red pill and went into further into Security.
I started watching videos, reading articles anything I could find with my limited OSINT skills.
Andy Jenkinson
Around this time I saw an post from a friend on LinkedIn, somebody was claiming DNS caused XYZ incident and was cause for the hack.
I watched and read.
I read about how DNS was allegedly used to directly inject malware and then execute it on the machine.
I googled a few things and then asked the question on a different post ‘so how did the malware get onto the machine?’ this was on a SolarWinds post.
I asked again about a week later on another post relating to it and I was shocked to find I was then blocked.
I had all the receipts and evidence so I put out the first Article of ‘FUD fighters’ relating to DNS, now I am going to skip over a lot here as I have made several articles and spoken to many very professional professionals about DNSSEC and things over the years.
Hell I’ve actually messaged back and forth with the person whom invented DNS.
I was able to do this because I am actually a nice guy (not just the character I play online) and asked questions after doing my own research (the best way to do things) conduct yourself like a professional and you will be amazed at what you can do.
If you want to read them they are the following, direct links to my Articles starting 2022:
FUD Fighters: What is DNS, and why does ‘that bloke’ go on about it?
‘Smoke and Mirrors’ - How Snake Oil peddlers Con Companies and Steal Money - by far the most popular, I should do a talk on this one
FUD FIVE : Misinformation and Disinformation Warfare
FF:SIX - Pattern Recognition for Dummies
FUD Fighters 8: The FUD of the Furious
Dan’s Technical Breakdowns - DNSViz : The Good, The Bad & The Ugly
The Most Prolific Serial Killer in the History of All Mankind…
The lucky break
I’ve spoken about this afew times but the TL;dr is, because I was able to show I had been applying for jobs over the years and had a solid history I was able to apply for a grant in our local area that aims to help people get back into work, I used that to get some cybersecuurity certs.
It paid for the expensive OSCP (unfortunately I failed that but intend to do resit after finding a PEN200.pdf), a cheaper eJPT (v1) which I nailed first time and a RTO exam I will take eventually.
There was supposed to be an attempt at the CCNA in there but when I came past a year and I was in a position to do it the funds ‘mysteriously’ disappeared, so I was stuck at that point.
I have left a lot out of this too like ‘being the first person to ever bring cubersecurity as an option to the table for this grant’ and others.
Part Time
I ended up getting a part time job at an electronics buyer and seller in the UK, I loved that job, staff discount came in handy at christmas for getting my son a switch (and an xbox, and a swich for the Mrs, and my Switch too). I wont go too personal here as I had to leave that job to care for someone.
This was an incredibly hard time for our small family and it will be some time before things are truely fully sorted out.
During this time I signed back up to TryHackMe and HackTheBox, and deleted them again bacuse of this bastard 👇
Imposter Syndrome
This is something that hits everyone in one form or another and BOY! does it suck!
I have completed so much in my spare time, so many TryHackMe certifications and boxes completed, deleted entirely in an instant (several times over) all because I never thought I was good enough baused I copied an answer or had to look at a walkthrough or guide.
I felt like I was such an asshole for needing help and never asking for it.
It’s a pretty shitty way of thinking about it now but at the time I thought I was letting everyone down so tearing it all down was the logical best step, this is how your brain works with Imposter Syndrome,, probably also a handful of other things I have going on that havent been tested for either.
This is what imposter syndrome is.. it is annoying and a gremlin you need to silence and work on, it will no go away instantly it will still hound you at every moment, what you do with that is the key
Beating it
For me I dedicated time, non negotable, I simply HAD to do XYZ for ABC amount of time per day.
It worked.
Slowly the voice receded and I focused more on what I can control, my time.
Through focus and absolute choice about what I wanted to be doing at the time I was able to get my learn on, fix my problems and build myself into something I wanted to be since the beginning.
I even got to talking to another good internet friend who offered me a voulenterring gig at his company, from that I built a few cool things though all of it hush hush minus the PBX system I stick together.
I was getting hands on experience that I could actually leverage for future applications.
1 win
Because of everthing I have done over the years, because of how passionately I talk about it, bcause I chose to share parts of the journey and what I was doing I was able to take it all into an interview and over 2 and a bit hours go over it all in better detail and really show what I can do.
It seems like, that might have just been enough to get a win.
It’s been a long journey to get here, honestly 6 years is too little when I think about it, I’ve been trying to do this since I saw that video, Jose took what I dreamed about being able to do and showed me that it was actually possible to do it in the real world and not just in movies.
Thank you dude.
I owe you.
Actually I owe many people for everything they have done and helped me with over the years.
I would not be here now, if it wasn’t for the people I met and the friends I made over the years.
Be open.
So what does it take?
It takes;
- understading.
- Guts.
- Passion.
- Pain.
- Regret.
- The feeling of being an imposter.
- Early mornings.
- I would say late nights but Cathrine knows, and would correct me in saying, if I stay up too long ‘old man genes’ cause me to fall asleep ANYWHERE(!).
- a good friend or two to help light the way.
You have to take all of that, and work with it not against it.
- Find systems that work - for you not others.
- Prep early - Less time thinking on what doesnt matter.
- Learn - take time, pomodaro if you have to it does work.
- Relearn - dont just delete everything, do it again, actually do it again.
- Be yourself - don’t hide from who you are.
You absolutely will not get it right the first time.
You will find better ways of taking notes, different apps you can try but nothing will stop you trying, take that first step and fail.
You will learn more from failure then you will from success.
Fail early and Win big.
I know I did.
Now you can do an ‘any % cybersecurity role’ speedrun.
<3
Might be quiet for a bit while I get used to this new role.
Be safe.
Fight FUD.
I beleive in you.
🤙
I don’t have any sponsors or anything but if you enjoy my work, or feel sympathy for my wife, then I have set up a Ko-Fi account as well as a BuyMeACoffee people can donate to.